In his late 60s, Nigel felt stuck. Severe anxiety had taken over his life, and he’d been referred for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to help. But this was a problem for him. He’d tried CBT before, and long term, it hadn’t worked.
On top of those negative thoughts, his anxiety was so overwhelming that he couldn’t engage with the therapy meaningfully. He was trapped in a cycle: too anxious to benefit from the treatment designed to help his anxiety.
The Solution Focused Hypnotherapy CHALLENGE
When Nigel came to see me, he was honest about his frustration: “I’m having CBT again, it didn’t work before, so it’s making me anxious. I want to understand what’s going on in my head.”
His goal wasn’t to fix everything overnight. He just wanted to understand his anxiety well enough to give CBT a proper chance. “I would be able to go into the CBT with an open mind and actually work with the counsellor,” he told me.
Starting point: Feeling 4 out of 10
THE JOURNEY
Understanding the Brain (Week 1)
The first breakthrough came when Nigel learned about REM sleep and how it processes emotions. It wasn’t mystical or complicated – it was neuroscience. His brain needed the right conditions to handle the anxiety it was storing up.
He committed to listening to a relaxation audio every night, stopping the habit of dwelling on anxious thoughts, and building a proper bedtime routine. The key phrase that stuck with him: “Practice makes permanent, not perfect.”
He didn’t need to get it right every time. He just needed to keep practising.
The Penny Drops (Week 3)
This was the turning point for Nigel, and he described it perfectly: “The penny is dropping. I find myself noticing what part of the brain I’m in and tell it to shut the F* up!”**
He was learning to recognise when his primitive brain was triggering anxiety responses and he was actively choosing to shift to his intellectual brain instead. It wasn’t theory anymore. It was real, and it was working.
The Real-World Test (First CBT Session)
Then came the ultimate test. Nigel’s first CBT appointment went wrong in every possible way.
He was sent to the wrong postcode in Sheffield, and his anxiety kicked in hard. Plus, his appointment was reduced to just 30 minutes. The old Nigel would have cut and run. But this is what happened instead:
“Whatever it was, it stopped the flight mode, and I calmed myself down before Helen came and got me. Had it not been for the work we did, she would not have liked the Nigel she met … the stroppy Nigel. But because you taught me to self-calm, I was able to get through being sent to the wrong postcode and stop myself from going into flight mode.”
He didn’t just survive the appointment; he showed up as the version of himself who could actually engage with therapy.
Professional Validation for Solution Focused Hypnotherapy and myself
Nigel’s CBT counsellor, Helen, sent me this message after their first session:
“Thanks very much for sending this across Darren, and for talking with me on Tuesday. It was really helpful to get that overview from you. I think it’s been a really helpful way to start for him and a very different experience which has been important too. I think there’s a good fit between the things you’ve done with him and my way of working which is great and will hopefully be a solid foundation for our work.”
The foundation was working. Niel was ready.
Navigating Setbacks (August)
A few months into CBT, everything hit at once: his case worker left, his therapist (me) relocated, and Helen went on holiday. Nigel nearly quit.
But he didn’t. He recognised what was happening, worked through it with Helen, and got back on track. The resilience he’d built through our sessions held firm.
THE TRANSFORMATION
Before Solution Focused Hypnotherapy:
- Severe anxiety was preventing CBT engagement
- Previous CBT treatment was unsuccessful
- Flight mode response to stress
- Unable to self-calm
- Feeling 4/10
After 6 sessions:
- Successfully engaged with CBT for the first time
- Self-calming under crisis conditions
- Understanding brain responses
- Progressed from severe to moderate anxiety
- Feeling 8/10
Nigel’s Reflections
Seven months after our final Solution Focused Hypnotherapy session, Nigel sent me this update:
“Hiya Fin, hope you are well. Just to let you know my treatment is going well. I’ve gone from severe to moderate in ten sessions and another 20 to go and more if it’s needed. So I think the work you did with me has helped me get to where I am now, so again thank you for that.”
He’s progressed from severe to moderate anxiety. From being unable to engage with CBT to actively progressing through it. From flight mode to the foundations of positive thinking and actions.
Where Nigel Is Now
Nigel is continuing his CBT journey with the tools and awareness he gained from our six sessions together. When everything went wrong on that first CBT appointment, he didn’t run. He calmed himself down and walked through the door.
That moment captures everything. From someone who couldn’t engage with therapy because of anxiety to someone who can manage a crisis, self-calm, and show up ready to do the deeper work.
His CBT counsellor got to meet the real Nigel, not “stroppy Nigel” in flight mode, but the version of himself who understands his brain, knows how to regulate his responses, and is ready to heal.
Sometimes clients don’t need me to fix them… they need the tools to understand their brain, learn how to calm it down, and show up for the work. Six sessions of solution focused hypnotherapy gave Nigel exactly that. It helped him prepare for successful CBT engagement and move from a scale of 4 to 8.
If traditional talking therapies haven’t worked for you, or if anxiety is preventing you from engaging with treatment, Solution Focused Hypnotherapy can provide the foundation you need to move forward.
